“A new way of hating.”
11
Jun
∞
08
Jun
∞
A new ad informs me that I shouldn’t let erectile dysfunction get in the way of my tropical vacation.
∞
Overheard: ‘all the interesting people i know have feelings.’
30
May
∞
‘Life is a cruel teacher, first she gives you the test, then she gives you the lesson.’
27
May
∞
Sign of the times: rectangle steak. no bone.
26
May
∞
New cellphone ring - ice cream truck
20
May
17
May
∞
the internet dance party
SOMEONE should host an internet song dance party where all the songs the DJ plays are ones that got were internetpopularized. And I don’t mean just like some myspace band sensation…let me illustrate with a suggested playlist:
“Never Gonna Give You Up” by Rick Ashley (aka the Rick Rolled song)
etc and so forth.
Make your song suggestion to the DJ in the comments.
13
May
∞
micropony precedent
Turns out I’m not the first person to come up with MICROPONY. I found two real precedents. However, one, seen in the video, is wayyyy too small:
There is also microponies.com. In contrast, these are too large.
The ideal MICROPONY is no larger than a fully-grown housecat.
∞
citizen journalist to be redundant phrase within year
I predict that within a year we won’t be saying citizen journalist anymore. We’ll just have to come up with a different way to say “people who are curious and write about things just because they want to.”
10
May
∞
Terminator movie is running late night extended faux infomercials for skynet research. kinda funny.
08
May
∞
Grindstone
If you’re going to put your nose to the grindstone, make sure you pick the right grindstone.
06
May
∞
All the girls are busting out their Hunter rainboots in this weather.
05
May
∞
Take long =/ important, and vice versa
Just because it takes a long time doesn’t mean it’s important, and just because it’s important doesn’t mean it has to take a long time.
03
May
∞
MICROPONY
No longer will your child’s plaintive cries for a pony! a pony! go unanswered simply because you live in a 4th floor walkup. Now there’s MICROPONY! No bigger than a housecat, MICROPONY is an apartment-ready pony bred for the urban environment.
Imagine the spasms of joy erupting on your child’s face as their MICROPONY takes a trot around the coffeetable for the first time. Now they’ll really have something to tell the other Montessori kids, and be envied for!
Each MICROPONY is specially grown by Japanese scientists applying the same binding and stunting techniques of bonsai tree growers, just in utero. Pony utero.
MICROPONY isn’t just fun in and of itself, he also gives new value to discarded toy. Try Webkinz-herding, Happy-Meal Toy rodeo, or I-don’t-know-which-spaceship-this-is-for-LEGO sledge-pulling. The possibilities are only limited by their imagination and the number of toys underfoot.
MICROPONY: because you can.
* Act now and get a special bonus MICRODRESSAGE kit included, absolutely free!
